by Micah Hart
Here’s a quick trivia question for you: who is the Sixers mascot? I admit that before this morning, I didn’t know the answer to that question, as Philadelphia is one of a handful of NBA franchises (Suns, Knicks, Thunder, for example) without a nickname that lends itself easily to the task. Apparently the former mascot, Hip-Hop, was scaring the bejesus out of little kids, and the new Sixers ownership wanted to move in a new direction. Sounds like a good idea to me. What could be worse than a wascally-wabbit? Let’s see what the new choices are:
Are we sure this is the best three we could come up with, Philly? Let’s take them one by one:
Big Ben — I get the historical connection here, but a balding, rotund guy with bifocals doesn’t scream NBA basketball to me. What will he do during timeouts, forecast weather patterns for his forthcoming almanac?
B. Franklin Dogg — I don’t have a problem with a dog as the mascot, but B. Franklin Dogg is the worst name I have ever heard. Is he pretentious, like most people with initials for first names? Or is he like a zen practitioner, reminding himself to be, errr, himself (Be Franklin, Dogg!).
Phil E. Moose — They get the wordplay right — why not Phil E. Dogg? — but what does a Moose have to do with Philadelphia? Also, I realize those are just animated renditions of the characters, but Phil’s maniacal smile and giant orb-like eyes are kind of creeping me out.
Of the three characters, I suppose I like the dog the most, but I don’t know if I could stomach that name were I a Sixers fan.
Which of these three do you like the best/hate the least? The polls are open on the Sixers website, so let ’em know what you think. Myself, I’m taking the Montgomery Brewster route and choosing none of the above.