Calling The ‘Perfect Game’

By Nick Margiasso,

I was saving and saving, collecting the best calls of the NBA season’s first full month from the league’s most, err, interesting announcers. They were going to be jam-packed into one blog highlighting the best of the best and posted at the end of November.

Then it happened.

The Clippers’ TV announcers happened.

These guys, Ralph Lawler and Mike Smith, just did work on this night. Strange diatribes, crazy logic and just plain screaming — they had it all working for them on November 28. They just blew away a month’s worth of team announcers’ great calls, and certainly deserve their own moment in the sun. So, here’s the Clips announcers’ greatest hits and a breakdown of what it all meant to a fan lucky enough to have listened to a true ‘Perfect Game’ called during the Clippers contest.

A Wedgie?
Clippers Announcers: “Ladies and gentlemen, it’s our first wedgie of the season. There’s got to be a website that keeps track of that …”
Me: I can assure you, that is not a real web page on this site … yet.

Shah-vedd, you say?
Clippers Announcers: “The ‘V’ is not silent. Name a word with a silent ‘V.'”
Me: Huh? This exchange came at the expense of Wolves guard Alexey Shved. They didn’t drop the ‘V’ after all, though, opting to go with the definitely incorrect Shah-vedd pronunciation. Hey, it could have been worse, Alexey … you could have been “Shed.”

Landing on a hundred
Clippers Announcers: “First to 100 wins, it’s the [Lawler’s] law.”
Me: Nonsense right there. Just plain nonsense. Love it.

Scream and shout
Clippers Announcers: “Chris Paul, DeAndre Jordan … SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM dunk.”
Me: Perfect.


  1. Justin says:

    Love these guys. Best and most colorful announcing team in the NBA, followed by the Heat and Knicks announcers. Glad you featured them.

  2. shav says:

    these guys are the few unbiased commentators in this whole league! mike smith always does the research on other teams so they are very knowledgeable

  3. dattebayo says:

    My favourite announcers are still Reggie Miller and Kevin Harlan, but they only do one game per week. Heat, Clippers and Wolves are decent, but they are nothing like Stacey King. I can’t stand the one commentator in Utah and I don’t like the Lakers analyst Stu Lantz. I hope Brian Scalabrine will retire Tommy Heinsohn eventually, Tommy knows the game but he is too often too biased for his beloved Celtics.

    Btw. great dunk from Jordan, but where is the foul? Clippers couldn’t pull this one out if it weren’t for those officials. Griffin flopped once where he faked a charge on Malcom Lee. For some reason Shved was called for traveling twice and even though I thought the fouls were evenly called, checking the boxscore I saw that Pek only shot 2 fts which means he didn’t get any calls. Griffin disappeared and the Wolves didn’t play well enough on D to get the win.